It’s a peaceful Sunday evening as I write this, and I’m a little sad the week has come to an end.
Why, you ask?
Because I’ve been “on strike” since last Sunday, and it’s been EFFING GLORIOUS.
Like probably many of you, I know I have it good: I have so much privilege, safety, and security others do not; so much to be grateful for; mainly just “first-world problems”; and a husband and child who are usually pretty enjoyable.
But some weeks? Good God. Sometimes I just want to pack a suitcase and run away.
Maybe I’ve had it because it’s been over a year now since the pandemic started, and the “default load” of parenting has been so much heavier with all of us at home all the time.
Or perhaps my family’s attitude felt like such a disappointment after just coming home from a weekend with a good friend who knows me so well.
Whatever made me “snap,” I was NOT having my “nice” family’s thinking-they’re-so-funny-but-really-it’s-more-snarky responses anymore. SCREW THAT.
Have you had moments like this?
What exactly happened, what I did and didn’t do “on strike,” and what the plan is going forward aren’t important right now, which is why this is just “Part 1” and a short intro to what we might learn from this.
What IS important — and what I want to have you check in on yourself with — is the realization that we are all tolerating things in our lives right now that we know aren’t sustainable.
WILL YOU KEEP BOILING?
… like a frog in water, getting hotter and hotter, gradually adjusting until some part of you dies off?
I’m so aware of this, but I still do it anyway — giving others the benefit of the doubt, thinking “if I just try harder” that I can change others’ behavior, giving things more time and hoping that circumstances will eventually change.
All of this just leaves me disappointed and continually frustrated. And with my family, that means I turn into a bitter, put-out NAG. (and, truth be told, a bit of a martyr, too)
or …
WILL YOU JUMP THE HELL BACK?
The more I think about it, the more I realize that being away for the weekend pulled me away from tolerating how unevenly our household had been running. Therefore, being smacked in the face with it all again upon my return felt startling and shocking enough to be motivated to recoil and say “Oh, HELL no!”
And that’s the inspiration for my lessons this week:
- Our families and other VIPs aren’t going to change their behavior, especially if it involves more work or inconvenience for them.
- NOTHING in our lives can change until we, ourselves, know what’s worth changing and are motivated enough to make it happen.
- Only then can we find the focus to tackle our most important issue(s). [instead of continuing to juggle “all the things”]
- From this point, we can empower ourselves to change how WE behave, and then we can approach others we need help from in a way that makes life better for all involved.
WANNA JUMP, BUT DON’T KNOW HOW?
I’m thinking of rebranding my free “Quick Relief Virtual Session” and calling it something like a “Take It Off My Plate” mini-session. [If I had renamed it last week it’d probably be the “EFF THIS SHIT!” mini-session, ha ha – too bold?!???]
The general idea is the same: we talk about what’s driving you crazy, find you an empowering solution to get started with, and I follow up via email to see how it went.
I’m still on a mission to help as many burnt-out women as I can, so:
- Yes — it’s free
- No — I don’t try to sell you my services on this call,
- No — you don’t have to be a mom to take advantage of this, and
- Yes — I really want you to book this with me even if you have no intention of buying further coaching from me!
Book your “60 Minutes to Solutions” session here: https://dianaforbes.com/free-consult/
Or — too hard to commit to a scheduled time to chat? Try Voxer! Here’s what you do: Check out the free “walkie talkie” app, Voxer, and connect with me there — I’m Diana Forbes – dforbe906 (https://web.voxer.com/u/dforbe906). Once we get connected, share your “they’re driving me CRAZY” situation with me and I can give you some coaching and feedback to get started.